Why can't you find an Abbey National at the North Pole?

Because Santa dere.

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Which snakes are found on cars?

Windscreen vipers.

What is a Mathematician's favorite thing to drink?

Root beer. (tbh: found on a Laffy taffy wrapper)

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What do you get from a cow on the North Pole?

Cold cream!

What do you call a terrorist in the North Pole?

An ISISicle!