Which doctor?

I replied "No, a medical one."

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Why did you arrest that doctor?

Officer: He was trying to take someone's pulse.

Why did the cat go to the doctors?

Because it wasn't feline well

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Which side is it best to lie on?

She asked. "The side that pays your fee" replied the doctor.

How many trains have you derailed to date?

I replied "It's hard to keep track."