Why can Saint Nicolas never be prosecuted?

Because of the Santa Clause

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Why is Santa Clause always so Jolly?

Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

What is red and white and red and white and red and....?

Santa Clause rolling down a hill

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Who's the nicest player in the NFL?

Drew Brees. The guy's a saint.

Why can Saint Nicolas never be prosecuted?

Because of the Santa Clause