How do you get a cellist to play fortissimo?

Write 'pp espressivo'.

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What do you call a girl who plays tennis on her knees?

Courtney.

Where's Wally?

Book today but couldn't find one anywhere. Well played, Wally. Well played.

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What instrument does God play?

He plays the cello. As it says in scripture: "Our God is a cellist God."

How do you get a cellist to play fortissimo?

Write 'pp espressivo'.