How do you wake up a loafer?

With a shoe horn.

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What's the first thing a Navy wife does when she wakes up in the morning?

She puts her clothes back on and goes home.

How is that a problem?

The man says, "I don't wake up until 10:30."

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What does a baker wear on his feet?

Loafers.

What shoes does Brad wear?

Loafers!