Why is there no volume control on the microwave?

Must it always wake the entire house when I'm trying to quietly nuke the last of the pizza

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What's red, white, and full of holes?

Helen Keller's face after she tries to use a fork.

What do you you say when a monk tries to kick you out of the monastery?

Namaste

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

Why do Italians throw pizza onto the field after they win a match?

Because they rain supreme.

What did the angry dough ball say to the other dough ball?

You trying to get a rise out of me! Came up with while I was making pizza.

Microwave Jokes More Microwave Jokes

Whats the hardest thing about microwaving vegtables?

Fitting the wheelchair in the microwave.

How long does it take To microwave a baby?

I'm too busy jerking of to watch a timer.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What's long and hard every time you wake up?

Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to.

What do you call Washington State after a long rain storm?

Washed a Ton State. I woke up with that joke in my head this morning. My brain is weird. Had to share it with someone.

Nuke Jokes More Nuke Jokes

Why did the nuke switch course?

Because a girl on the ground said "I have a boyfriend" later that day the nuke fell into depression

How do they cook a turkey in Russia?

They nuke it. OR In Soviet Russia, Turkey fires you!