How many pollsters does it take to change a light bulb?

One, plus or minus one.

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How many maple leafs does it take to change a tire?

Only 1, unless it's a blowout then the whole team shows up

How many stoners does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, the room is already lit.

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How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb?

One, although it's probably screwed in too tight anyway.

How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one, but it takes three episodes.