What's a priest's favorite X-men?

A-Men.

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Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment?

A mental hospital.

How can you tell if a man has a high sperm count?

You have to chew before you swallow!

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What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

What's long and hard and full of "SEE-MEN"?

A submarine, obviously.