Why are art contests so disappointing?

They always end in a draw

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Why can't anarchists draw straight lines?

Because they don't have any rulers.

What do you call a drawing of Ketchup?

Sketchup

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What's a word that starts with "u" and ends with "w"?

Cloning.

How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and one to give it a surprising twist at the end.