How can Ozzy Osbourne possibly sing that?

When Tony Iommi is standing right next to him, alive and well.

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What does the H. in Jesus H. Christ stand for?

Hallmark. God cares enough to send the very best.

Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

Because the captain was standing on the deck! Aargh

Sing Jokes More Sing Jokes

What Christmas Carol do they sing in North Korea?

We Three Kims

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman?

The Rolling Stones sing "Hey You! Get off of my cloud!" A Scotsman shouts "Hey Mcleod!! Get off of my ewe!"