How do you make a racing snail faster?

I tried taking his shell off but it only made him more sluggish.

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Why was ex so lonely at the party?

Because every time he tried to integrate, he ended up with himself.

What did the right testlcle say to the left?

Look at this guy in the middle trying to act all hard

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Why did the shell not go to the beach?

Because he was self-CONCH-ious.

How do snails get their shells all shiny?

They use snail Polish.