How does a penman make his living?

He charges a calligra-fee of course!

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What's the difference between an attorney and a herd of buffalo?

The attorney charges more.

What's the best way to see a charging herd of elephants?

On television!

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What's easier to unload, a truck full of bowling balls or a truck of babies?

The babies of course, you can use a pitchfork!

What type of phones do fish use?

Shellular*, of course...