How many political idealists does it take to change a light bulb?

None, political idealists can't change anything.

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How many leftists does it take to change a lightbulb?

8,000 to protest against the broken lightbulb but 0 to realize it won't change anything.

Why did your car just spin around in circles?

Motorist: I was making a U-turn and changed my mind.

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How many Apple executives does it take to change a light bulb?

They dont. They turn it into the hype of the new generation.

How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.