How many sound technicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One....Two...One, Two...

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How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

How many Northern Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Hella.

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How many bees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but how do they get in there?

How many activists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, because they can't change anything.