What did the baby skunk want to be when he grew up?

A big stinker!

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Why did the pro football player from the last-place team drop pieces of hamburger into his soup?

He wanted to know how it felt to take part in a Soup-er Bowl!

What's the 4th grade essay in the Detroit School District?

What I want to be *if* I grow up.

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What's another name for an parent?

Someone who's stopped growing except around the waist.

Why did the excluded tree grow?

To be long.