What's it like being a grown up?

Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly

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Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

Why did the ghoul knit herself three socks?

Because she grew another foot.

How are babies different from feminists?

Babies grow up and stop crying

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What did the author tell his publisher when he handed him a 600 pages instead of the 200 the publisher had asked for?

Sorry, I overwrote your order.

Why can't an Italian snake talk?

Because it doesn't have any hands.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What happens when you give an Italian a coupon?

It makes the Dego buy faster.

What do you call a law enforcement agency that refuses to buy it's own vehicles?

The pro-lease department

10 Jokes More 10 Jokes

Why are 1980 pennies worth more than 1979 pennies?

Dads joke) The same reason 10 pennies is worth more than 9.

When asked which is more important looks or brains?

9 out of 10 zombies said "braaaaiiiiinnnnssss" number 10 ate the researcher.

Movie Jokes More Movie Jokes

What made you leave it?

Well, the movie ended so

What's that movie about the girl who forgets Adam Sandler every day?

I want to know her secret

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Who's there! Bellows! Bellows who?

Bellows me some money can I have it please!

What would you do if you won the lottery?

Two friends meet together and one asks: What would you do if you won the lottery? -I would build a brothel! Oh, and if it went wrong and you loose money? -I'd open it to the public

M Jokes More M Jokes

Where were you born?

Me: Missouri. I: What state are you in now? M: Apathy. I: That's not what I meant. M: I don't care.

What'd u ask Santa for 6: a speed boat M: like a Lego boat?

6: no M: oh for the bath 6: no M: the pool 6: *doesnt break eye contact* no