What's it like being a grown up?

Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly

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Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

Why are hippies against capitalism?

Because money doesn't grow on trees.

Why did the baby kangaroo not want to grow up?

It was a wannabe wallaby!

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Who is the easiest to get a high-five from in a war?

The French. They always have their hands up.

What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times?

Two octopuses shaking hands.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why does she keep cleaning the floors?

Me: Her stepsisters make her. 5: She should just buy a Roomba.

How many people does it take to change a light bulb?

Is just one of the questions I should have asked before buying a lighthouse....

10 Jokes More 10 Jokes

Why isn't there a Windows 9?

Hey Microsoft, why is there no Windows 9? You've given us 7 and 8, and now you're skipping straight to 10?" "Well, to be completely honest, 7 8 9."

Whats the difference between a baby and a 10g of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldnt let a bag full of cocaine fall off the window

Movie Jokes More Movie Jokes

What movie did they go to see?

Closed for Winter".

How can one get rid of the echo while playing a movie?

Get some furniture

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What kind of money do polar bears use?

Ice!

How many Elvis impersonators does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One for the money, two for the show.

M Jokes More M Jokes

How'd family dinner go?

ME: Huge mess to clean. F: It's spotless! M: *sprays luminol* You'd never know they were even here.

What's it like being a grown up?

Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly