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What do conspiracy nuts do to fall asleep?

They count sheeple.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell into the snow?

Nothing, she was wearing mittens.

Why did the airplane fall out of the sky?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How many legs does the dog have?

4 y.o: Five Me: There's something wrong with your counting. 4: There's something wrong with the dog.

What's the difference between Gabe Newell and a toddler?

A toddler can count past two...