What do New York McDonald's employees and people who read Ulysses have in common?

Liberal Arts Degrees.

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What do you call a wizard that puts people to sleep?

Dumblebore

What do you call a group of singing people floating around in the ocean?

An acappellago

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Why do the undead read cringe stories?

Because they're already... DEAD INSIDE.

Who were the first people not to read the apple ToC?

Adam and Eve