What do vegetables watch when they're feeling frisky?

Cornography

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Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did the farmer feel after he ripped his clothing?

Let's just say he felt overall sadness.

Why did the cookie visit the doctor?

He was feeling a little crummy.

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

They don't change it. They just watch it burn out, then follow it around for another 15 years.

Why couldn't the pregnent women watch all of the Harry Potter movies?

Because they lactate.

Vegetable Jokes More Vegetable Jokes

What does a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common?

They both can be used to carry vegetables....

What do root vegetables do at tha club?

Turnip