What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce patch?

A seizure salad.

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What is an epileptics favourite food?

Seizure Salad

What do you do with epileptic lettuce?

You make a seizure salad.

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What Do You Call an Epileptic in a Pile of Leaves?

Russell

What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in your laundry.