Epileptic Jokes

What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce patch?

A seizure salad.

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What do you do with an epileptic in a bathtub?

Laundry.

What do you call an epileptic in the garden?

Seizure salad

What do you do if an epileptic has a seizure in your bath?

Throw in your washing.

Where do epileptics get pizza?

Little Seizures.

What Do You Call an Epileptic in a Pile of Leaves?

Russell

How do epileptics greet people?

They shake.

What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?

A seizure salad!

What do you call a bowl full of leaves and epileptics?

Seizure Salad.

What do you call an epileptic in a deck chair?

A transformer.

How do epileptics keep fit?

With strobe lights.

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What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in your laundry.

What do you can an epileptic What do you call an epileptic in a garden?

Seizure salad. edit: fixed the word 'call'

What do you call an epileptic with a personality disorder?

A myclonic jerk.

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What do you call an epileptic frolicking in a garden?

Seizure salad.

What do you do with epileptic lettuce?

You make a seizure salad.

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What do you call a guy who falls into a Yellowstone hot spring?

Stew.

What do you call 4 lepers in a jacuzzi?

Stew

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What did Helen Keller say when she fell into the snow?

Nothing, she was wearing mittens.

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

Dirty Laundry Jokes More Dirty Laundry Jokes

What do you do when you see someone having a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of dirty laundry and some detergent.

Why was the deaf man sighing and shaking his head in disgust when he looked over at his next door neighbour?

Because she was *airing her dirty laundry*!!!

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

How many contortionists fit in the trunk of a regular sedan?

Depends on the size of the pieces.

What did the husband say to his wife when he tried pushing it in as much as he could, but it still wouldn't fit?

He said "I'm going to try on a different shoe size."

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What does Bill Cosby do when he can't sleep at night?

He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea.

What is the difference between in-law and vultures?

Vultures attack first, when you are dead.

Jacuzzi Jokes More Jacuzzi Jokes

What do you call 4 lepers in a jacuzzi?

Stew

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Stew. Bonus: what do you do if an epileptic jumps into a jacuzzi? You throw in your laundry.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

How do you confuse Hellen Keller?

Give her a basketball and tell her to read it.

Why did I stop reading M.C Escher books on the bus?

Because I always get weird stairs