What do you feed a 600 pound Gorilla?

Anything it wants!

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Why did Sherlock Holmes not want a second cup of tea in the emergency room?

Because it was More ER Tea.

Why did Mubarak and Gaddafi get dehydrated?

They didn't want water from the Arab Spring.

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How do you get money out of a piggy bank?

Feed it laxatives.

Why did the man put cheese on his computer?

He wanted to feed the mouse.