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What does IKEA furniture do when it's stolen?

Activates its shelf destruct sequence.

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What do you call a Mexican who's car got stolen?

Carlos.

Why did Robin Hood steal from the rich?

Because the poor didn't have any!

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What does IKEA furniture do when it's stolen?

Activates its shelf destruct sequence.

What did the sprinter with diarrhea do during the race?

He activated his bo...