What does Shakespeare say when he is angry with his dog?

Out, out, damned Spot!

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What's updog?

Mom: Just waking you up for school, dog, what's up wit u Dad (from hallway): OWNED

What does a dog see in the mirror?

A chair

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

When one gun says to the other, "Damn dude, those are some nice bullets, where'd you get them?

The second gun says, "In some old magazine I found."

What's in the bottle?

Me: "It's water." Cop: "This is wine." Me: "What! That Jesus! He did it again!"

Shakespeare Jokes More Shakespeare Jokes

What's Shakespeare's favorite video game?

Sonnet the hedgehog

What do you call a nervous javelin thrower?

Shakespeare.