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What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond?

He had him newt-ered.

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What happened to the number 10?

It got stuck in 9/11

What happened to the gun that kept randomly shooting?

He got fired.

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Why couldn't the lizard be aroused?

He had a reptile dysfunction (I just made that up but I'm sure it's been thought of)

What do you call it when your lizard doesn't know how to use the internet?

E-reptile dysfunction