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What happened to the man who died from drinking Shellac?

He had a *lovely finish*.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What's love?

Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!

How much have you had to drink?

Me: Like six carrot juices Cop: Please step out of the hamster wheel

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to the baseball played who was unfaithful to his wife?

He was thrown out at home. - His two balls got a strike.

What happens when you put the Energizer bunny's batteries in backwards?

It keeps coming, and coming, and coming...

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did James Bond higher a man with Parkinson's to be his butler?

He likes his drinks shaken, not stirred.

How many men does it take to moderate /r/MensRights?

None. There are no there.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How many times we need to tell you that she died?

Man: It pleases me to listen that she died.

What do you think Michael Hastings was working on before he died?

Slowing down his car....... shoutout to for this one.