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Why did the lizard go on a diet?

It weighed too much for its scales!

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Lizard Jokes More Lizard Jokes

What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house?

The Lizard of Oz!

Why couldn't the lizard have any children?

It had a reptile dysfunction!

Scale Jokes More Scale Jokes

Why did the redditor stand on a piece of fruit to check his weight?

BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE

Why wouldn't the snake go on the weighing maching?

Because he had his own scales!

Diet Jokes More Diet Jokes

Why I gotta do it too?

Her: No I in team Me: Isn't 1 in diet either. Her: Yes there.. Me: I'm too hungry for your mindgames!

Why did the elephants go on a diet?

Because they had too much junk in the trunk.

Weigh Jokes More Weigh Jokes

Where do you weigh a whale?

At a whale weigh station

Where do they weigh whales?

At the whale weigh station of course.