What's the first thing you know?

Old Jed's a millionaire.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you call a wife that knows where her husband is at all time?

A widow

What's a orphans first words?

I don't know. But it sure as hell isn't mommy or daddy.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the difference between astronomy and gastronomy?

Astronomy is about things too big to wrap your head around, while gastronomy is about things small enough to wrap your head around.

How strict is the "I licked it, it's mine" policy?

There's some things I've licked that I don't want.