What would you call a nine day old dog in Russia?

A puppy.

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Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

When she asks "is that your puppy?

Say "No. That's my dad." Then storm off.

How about an office party?

ME: crosses out "replace coworkers with puppies" I guess

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Why couldn't Edward leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why can't Edward leave Russia?

He's Snowden.