Where do you find monster snails?

On the end of monsters fingers.

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How did you find your steak sir?

Customer: Oh I just moved the potatoes and there it was!

What is the most faithful insect?

A flea once they find someone they like they stick to them!

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When I have complicated problems I always ask myself, what would my imaginary wife do?

And then I end up buying myself cupcakes, and shoes.

What is a four-letter word for a woman that ends in "unt"?

Aunt.