Who did the Dyslexic Devil Worshipper sell his soul to?

Santa

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What is the biggest difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?

Santa stops at three Ho's

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

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How much does Nicki Minaj sell security devices for?

Pound an alarm

Why were the ducks arrested?

They were selling quack in the park.

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Who did the Dyslexic Devil Worshipper sell his soul to?

Santa

Where's the election victory that you promised me?

Satan: Where's the soul that you said you had