Who laughs the last?

The one who you have to explain the joke to.

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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one provided there's a programmer around to explain how to do it.

What happens if you're late to extremophile school?

You get a tardy grade. (that explains the joke if you don't get it.)

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What do you call chocolate eggnog?

Nignog. Eh I laughed.

Why does nobody laugh at zombie-Peter Pan's jokes?

He always tells them with a dead Pan face.

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Why do people at work always laugh at my jokes?

Because they're paid to.

Knock! Knock! Who's there! Beets! Beets who?

Beets me but I just forgot the joke!