Whole Foods ME: Hi CLERK: Hello ME: Do you...uh CLERK: Do we what?

ME: Do you have any...uh CLERK: Go on ME: Do you have any Half Foods

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Who's there? Orange. Orange who?

Orange you glad I painfully waited until I was done cooking your food to take a poop?

What did Shrek say when the waiter dropped off his food at the German Restaurant?

Donkey!" (Danke) You gotta say it with the Shrek accent to work.