Why do vampires hate arguments?

Because they make themselves cross.

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Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Who Hates Everyone?

A 4chan!

Why does the NSA hate winter?

Because they're not used to getting Snowden.

Argument Jokes More Argument Jokes

What does an empathetic kleptomaniac do in an argument?

He puts himself in the other person's shoes and then walks away.

What do you call a guy who can't get a word in edgewise during an argument?

A "moderator", apparently.

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What do you call a vampire in a raincoat?

Mack-u-la!

How do vampires like their tea?

With a old tampon in it.