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Why did the apple cry?

Its peelings were hurt.

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Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

What do you call a man who cries while he pleasures himself?

A tearjerker

Why do onions have poor self-image?

Because people cry when they get onions naked.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

Why did Steve Jobs die too soon?

Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange?

Because the lime was engaged.

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

Why did the hipster's mouth hurt?

Because he ate pizza before it was cool.

What did the blonde say when she knocked over a priceless Ming vase?

A. "It's okay Daddy I'm not hurt."