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Why does Jesus Jaywalk?

Because he hates crosswalks

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What is Jesus' favorite video game on earth?

I am bread.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Mexico?

They couldn't find three wise men or a virgin.

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Why does the corn hate the farmer?

Because he picks his ears!

What did the doctor tell the panda bear after the results of his child's paternity test came back?

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the results are a bit grizzly.