Why is it best to ship boxes using a UPS truck?

The DOWNS truck is a little slow.

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How did Saddam deal with his leftovers?

He used sarin wrap

Why does a barber never shave a man with a wooden leg?

Because he always uses a razor.

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Why do they write PIZZA all over the box?

What else could possibly be in there

What's the healthiest sport a pregnant women can play?

Kick boxing

Ups Jokes More Ups Jokes

Did you hear the news?

FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.

What's the difference between Limburger cheese and my friend Ted?

One is white and stinks, and the other is cheese. (As told to me by the UPS guy)