How does a paralympian call home, after winning a medal?

Handsfree

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What do Philadelphia Eagles fans do after they win the superbowl?

Turn of madden and go to bed. (I'm an eagles fan)

What did the electrical engineer do when she found out that she hadn't won the lottery?

She soldered on.

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How does a paralympian call home, after winning a medal?

Handsfree

Why does Mexico never wins any medals at the Olympic Games?

Because everyone who runs, swims, or jump really well is already across the border.