Medal Jokes

How does a paralympian call home, after winning a medal?

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Why does Mexico never wins any medals at the Olympic Games?

Because everyone who runs, swims, or jump really well is already across the border.

Why does Mexico rarely wins medals at the Olympic Games?

All the ones who can run/swim/jump already made it to America.

What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals?

A guard dog!

Whats better than winning a medal at the paralympics?

A pair of legs.

How does North Korea only have four medals so far?

We're the best at everything. We even fed our athletes this time.

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How amazing is Michael Phelps?

He's got like a Brazilian Medals.

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

Gold Medal Jokes More Gold Medal Jokes

What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being

What is better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics?

Having two legs

Medale Jokes More Medale Jokes

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

What did Lochte say after his teammates told the police what really happened?

And I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!

Men Jokes More Men Jokes

Why are Mens bathrooms usually to the left?

Because women are right.

What do you call a team of Christian mutant superheroes?

The A-Men

Olympic Games Jokes More Olympic Games Jokes

How much did the Olympic Games cost?

About a Brazillion dollars.

Why does Mexico never wins any medals at the Olympic Games?

Because everyone who runs, swims, or jump really well is already across the border.

Border Jokes More Border Jokes

What makes a Mexican saddest about the rise of ebooks?

The closing of the Borders.

What do you call a Mexican in Canada?

ACCOMPLISHED. They crossed two borders!

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What do you call an alligator that wins a race?

A chompion. (7-year old me thought he was very clever.)

What colour T-shirt would win a race?

Red, because it runs the most.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why do people prefer shooting stars to vegetables?

Because they're meteor

How did Brandon Lee's wife get pregnant?

The prop guy said he was shooting blanks!