Shoot Jokes

What's the difference between a penalty shot in basketball, and a tiny curly wig designed for a bug?

One is a free throw, and the other is a flea 'fro.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why do people prefer shooting stars to vegetables?

Because they're meteor

Who Shot First? Boba Fett or Jango Fett?

Han Solo

What's the most casual crime you can commit?

Shooting the breeze.

What's the difference between spider man and Superman?

Peter Parker can shoot webs. Clark Kent.

What did Joss say on the last day of shooting the Avengers?

Whedon?

What did the man say when he couldn't get the gun to fire?

Looks like I'm gonna have to read the trouble shooting section of the manual.

Why did the 3-legged dog go back to Dodge City?

To see who shot his "paw."

Why was the actor detained by airport security?

He said he was in town to shoot a pilot.

Where do people who say "shoot" and "darn" go to?

Heck

What kind of soldier doesn't need bullets?

The kind of soldier that's always shooting his mouth off.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do you call a Car Bomb shot with a shot of Fireball?

A Paul Walker.

Why did the cowboy brush his teeth with gunpowder?

So he could shoot his mouth off.

What do you call a camera that shoots out true facts about an ancient Phoenician city?

A Canon, Canaan-canon cannon... (I'm not sorry...)

Why is cupid bad at basketball?

When he shoots, someone else scores.

What happened to the gun that kept randomly shooting?

He got fired.

What do cells say when their sister shoots their foot?

Mitosis

What do you call two line dancers doing the dance Shoot the Rooster?

A. A Pair of Shoot (parachute)

What stars go to jail?

Shooting stars.

Why was Star Wars shot Episodes 4, 5, 6, then 1, 2, 3?

Because in charge of directing, Yoda was

Why are criminals so good at basketball?

They shoot first and ask questions later.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit?

The first herd shot round the world!

What's the difference between a gun and amnesia?

Oh shoot, I forgot...

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What did one lesbian vampire say to her lover?

See you next month.

How many lovers do the religious have?

Nun!

Combat Jokes More Combat Jokes

What do snakes take to combat their allergies?

Anti-hissss-tamines!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why do you want to be buried at sea?

Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave.

Why do pagans make the best husbands and wives?

Because they'll worship the ground you walk on.

Sardar Jokes More Sardar Jokes

Black Man Jokes More Black Man Jokes

What N-word do you never want to call a black man?

Neighbor!

Why was the black man so tall?

Because his knee grows.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What does a caterpillar do on New Years Day?

Turns over a new leaf!

What do you with 365 used rubbers?

Turn it into a tire and call it a goodyear.

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Why didn't Rose get an iPhone 7?

She never let go, Jack.

Who's there! Ben Hur! Ben Hur who?

Ben Hur an hour - let me in!

Group Jokes More Group Jokes

What's the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do?

Go into town and gang-audit someone.

What do you do with percussionists that lose one of their drumsticks?

Stick them up front of the group and tell them to wave their arms!