How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb?

No one knows they never keep the house!

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How does a spoiled rich girl change a lightbulb?

She says, "Daddy, I want a new apartment."

How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.

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How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb?

How many did it take last year

How many absurdist/surrealist comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

November.