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How much longer do I have doc?

Doctor: "Ten." Patient: "Ten what " Doctor: "Nine..."

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Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to?

Barbers.

Which side is it best to lie on?

She asked. "The side that pays your fee" replied the doctor.

Patient Jokes More Patient Jokes

How bad are they?

Doctor: It depends, how old are you Patient: I will be 24 soon. Doctor: Pffff, no you won't.

Why was the Doctor screaming angrily at his secretary?

He ran out of patients.

Doc Jokes More Doc Jokes

Why is that, doc?

He replied, "I'm trying to examine you."

When Bruce Jenner finally gets his va-jay-jay operation done, will the docs give him a hymen?

And who's gonna be the lucky guy to pop it