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What are calories?

Little elves that tighten your waistband on your pants a little every night

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Pant Jokes More Pant Jokes

What did the blonde do after she combed her hair?

She pulled her pants up.

What kind of pants does the Pink Panther wear?

Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Deniiiiim

Calorie Jokes More Calorie Jokes

How many calories does heartache burn?

Me: Depends on how many calories are in the person you are setting on fire.

How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.