What did one pig say to the other?

Let's be pen pals!

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What's the form of public transit most rife with filth and disease?

Let's name our sandwich shop after it

What do you get when you cross a garden, a rabbit, and some ExLax?

For the love of everything sacred on reddit please do not make me actually key the answer....okay, let's say it together, "Salad Shooter".

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Why did the pig have ink all over his face?

Because it came out of the pen.

What was the pig doing in the kitchen?

Bacon! Get it?