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What did Shakespeare say when his dog messed up the carpet?

Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"*

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What dog rides a horse named Macaroni?

Yankee poodle!

What do you call a dog with no back legs and metal balls?

Sparky

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

What did the fish say when it hit the wall?

Dam.

What did the person say when a flood struck his house?

Damn it!

Mess Jokes More Mess Jokes

Who's there! Answer! Answer who?

Answer all over your porch! It's a mess out here!

What's the difference between toilet paper and shower curtains?

If you answered "I don't know." I would like to tell you that I spent all day cleaning that mess up.

Carpet Jokes More Carpet Jokes

What did the Mexican put under his carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

What does Speedy Gonzalez keep under his carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

Shakespeare Jokes More Shakespeare Jokes

What's Shakespeare's favorite video game?

Sonnet the hedgehog

What does Shakespeare say when he is angry with his dog?

Out, out, damned Spot!