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What's in the bottle?

Me: "It's water." Cop: "This is wine." Me: "What! That Jesus! He did it again!"

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Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What's a fireman's favourite drink?

Water.

What did the sea-world trainer's friend say to him after he spilled water on his friends lap?

You did that on porpoise

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad sky diver?

The bad golfer goes::Whack:: "Damn it!" The bad sky diver goes "Damn it!"::Whack::

What did Shakespeare say when his dog messed up the carpet?

Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"*

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Who do you think was smarter, Jesus or Buddha?

I mean, just in terms of not letting themselves get crucified.

What happened when Jesus forgot to look both ways?

He died on the cross!

Wine Jokes More Wine Jokes

Which is easier for a man to leave: the women or the Wine?

It depends on the age.

What's the big deal about Jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

Cop Jokes More Cop Jokes

Why did the cop wake up his son?

To stop a kid napping.

Who is driving?

A cop.

Bottle Jokes More Bottle Jokes

What's the biggest similarity between a bottle of Draino and a Danish stripper?

They both slowly remove clogs.

What do you call it when two bottles of lotion start dating?

A re-lotion-ship.