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What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

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Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What did the NFL Commissioner say when Adele turned down the Superbowl Halftime Show?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

What do you call a dictatorship founded on the principles of Ethos, Logos & Pathos?

An Aristotalitarian Regime.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?

Because then the children have to play inside.

What do you call a T-Rex that's been weightlifting all day?

Dino-sore

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

Whoa that's a lemon, how much did you pay?

Only $3,200" Dude it's literally a piece of fruit "Damn....not again"

How many house flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just the standard two, but I'll be damned if I know how they got in there.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What do people call Mozart and Beethoven after they died?

Decomposers

Why did Kyle Crane have to change the lightbulb?

Because he had a dying light

Atheist Jokes More Atheist Jokes

Why don't atheists use exponents?

Because they don't believe in higher powers.

Why can't Atheist solve exponential equations?

Because they don't believe in higher powers

Pearly Gates Jokes More Pearly Gates Jokes

What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

What does the atheist say when he arrives at the Pearly Gates?

I'll be goddamned.