What did the captain of the alien mouse spaceship say when he met his first earth mouse?

Take me to your Liederkranz.

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Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

What do you call it when you meet somebody in a bathroom at a conference?

Pee-er to pee-er networking (P2P).

Captain Jokes More Captain Jokes

Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

Because the captain was standing on the deck! Aargh

Why couldn't the sailors play cards?

Because the Captain was stood on the deck!