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Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

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Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

How did the urologist ruin his Christmas?

OC He looked inside Santa's sack.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Harry Potter?

Santa would never free an elf.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do you throw a drowning aboriginal?

His wife and kids

How does a butcher introduce his wife to his friends?

Meet Patty

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

Why did the necromancer fail to meet his quarterly sales goal?

He ran his business on a skeleton crew.

Where do you go to meet the best fish?

It doesn't matter - any old plaice will do.

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

What's the problem with your marriage?

WIFE: He replaces words with animal names just to annoy me ME: I don't do it on porpoise

How do you say the word "peanuts" *without* the letter "t"?

Think about it.

Clause Jokes More Clause Jokes

What do you call Santa without toys?

A lost Clause

Who corrects Santa's grammar?

A subordinate Clause.

Phrase Jokes More Phrase Jokes

What's the deal with the phrase "door ajar"?

I mean, is it a door or is it a jar?

What is the craziest/weirdest/most interesting/most unique/ uncommon phrase you've ever heard?

I am working on a project, and its going to revolve around a phrase. I need it to be really out there, yet could be used in everyday life. But honestly just give me anything you got.

Specialize Jokes More Specialize Jokes

What is a Mathematician specializing in absolute numbers called?

A Sith.

What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses?

Hippocampus!

Hook Jokes More Hook Jokes

Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

How do you catch a dyslexic fish?

Ya get it Hooked on Phonics!