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Why are steam trains naughty around Christmas?

They're hoping Santa will give them a lump of coal.

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Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

What do you call Santa's helpers?

Subordinate Clauses.

What goes "oh oh oh"?

Santa walking backwards.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What does a Mexican cop say when he wishes you a Merry Christmas?

Police Navidad.

What does a Christmas tree and a monk have in common?

They both have ornamental balls

Hope Jokes More Hope Jokes

How do you make a Whiskey Sour?

Crush it's hopes and dreams.

What should you do if you see a vicious dog?

Hope he doesn't see you.

Lump Jokes More Lump Jokes

What's the M0D's name before they're triggered; turning into a furious, putrid, lump of blubber?

Bruce Banner

What's the definition of a surprise?

A fart with a lump in it

Coal Jokes More Coal Jokes

What did the snowman say when he got coal for Christmas?

I can see!

Why did the Cephalopod get coal for Christmas?

Because he was on the nautilust.